50% of 3 to 6 year old girls say they worry about being fat
70% of 7 year old girls want to be thinner
50% of 9 year old girls have been on a diet
25% of young people diagnosed with anorexia are boys*

Parents, especially mothers play a major role when it comes to teaching teenagers (especially girls) how to love their body type. The pressures to look perfect like the celebrities and models they see used in advertising are making many young people unhappy with their bodies and themselves. This can lead to low self esteem and behavioural issues. In most cases there is nothing wrong with the way they look.

Melinda Hutchings, Eating Disorders Expert and Generation Next speaker says “pressures and fears are manifesting into eating disorders and self image problems… This is a time when bullying is on the rise, when violence is on the rise. Parents haven’t grasped the enormity of the issues facing our teenagers”.

So how can parents teach a young person to value themselves for themselves and not just for what they look like. How do you persuade girls not to objectify themselves and become ‘eye candy’ for someone else’s pleasure?

  • Don’t make food a big issue, even if you’re trying to get across healthy eating messages. Just make sure there is lots of healthy and nutritious food in the house.
  • Never mention the word ‘diet’. Try instead to encourage what they eat to be lifestyle choices. Make sure children do not over hear continuous conversations about the latest diet or fad. Otherwise girls will grow up thinking it is normal to restrict what they eat for the sake of being thin.
  • Get the children in your house involved with the cooking. Teach them the nutritional value of foods, what effect they have on our bodies and which foods help us stay health.
  • Make meal-times a stress-free family occasion by focusing on companionship and conversation, not who’s eating what.
  • Girls are very sensitive about what their dads think of them; this is after all the first man they ever get to know. Make sure dads don’t make comments about their daughter’s weight.
  • Don’t use food to feed emotions. Don’t let food be a substitute or something to feel guilty about.
  • Compliment your child’s body on what it does – not how it looks. Help them see their body as something useful and powerful, not something to be judged on appearance. Don’t admire celebrities for how thin they are.
  • Often teenagers obsess about their weight when they are feeling pressures in another part of their lives. Find out how your teenager is feeling and what is going on in their lives. Give them tools to deal with the pressures so they don’t turn to food for comfort.
  • Praise your teenager for their achievements and qualities rather than their appearance.
  • Teach children media awareness. Explain that not even the celebrities look like the images they see, thanks to airbrushing and stylists.
  • If your teenager is too harsh about their appearance, remind them that nobody, not even the celebrities are completely satisfied with the way they look. Accept them as they are and encourage them to do the same.
  • Listen to them. Eating disorders are often the last resort for young people who are not being heard any other way, or feel that eating is the only thing they can control in their lives.
  • Make sure your children can talk to you and that you hear what they’re saying – not what you want to hear.

* British Journal of Psychology

For more information contact the Butterfly Foundation. This organisation is dedicated to bringing about change to the culture, policy and practice in the prevention, treatment and support of those affected by eating disorders and negative body image.

Writer Helen Splarn. Editor Dr Ramesh Manocha.
Source: Daily Mail. Melinda Hutchings. The Butterfly Foundation.