When a teenager is really upset, parents often feel the need to do something — gather information (“Who hurt you and what’s their phone number?”), launch into a profound lecture, or maybe try a problem-solving technique they heard about in a TED talk.

A better first response: Grab a glitter jar.

It’s an idea psychologist Lisa Damour writes about in her new book, Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls. When she sees a young person in meltdown mode, she’ll simply take a glass jar filled with water and glitter (basically, a DIY snow globe), shake it up and place it on the table. “Let’s settle your glitter,” she’ll say, and together, they’ll watch the tiny specks fall.

– Michelle Woo, Lifehacker

Read more: Help an anxious teen with this glitter jar technique

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